smile^^

4.24am..
Everyone is sleeping…
only me…sitting in front of computer,
start to drop some messages here..

I remember,
for my presentation of web blog,
I ever mentioned that web blog can be used for personal online diaries,
Ya, ya, it’s my personal online diary now…..

This is no title for this blog
because i have no idea about its title
totally not idea at all……..

What i know is,
i feel stress..very very stress…and pain
i hate myself… why being so sensitive ,pessimistic ,cowardice and….
i hate everything all those roles and responsibilities
i hate environment surrounding me…
i hate myself cant do anything to handle it,
i hate myself cant do well…
i hate myself why i always thinking too much
i hate myself why i care about their feelings so much
i hate myself why i have putting too much of my expectation on them and cant
stand for their return to me
i hate them
But,
i HATE myself more…

Dunno what’s wrong with me now
Just feel want to express everything out…
But,
don’t dare to simply expressing my feeling out to anyone
It’s hurt..

Actually, i don’t hate them 我不恨他们, 我只是恨我自已…..
I should thank them
cause i’ve growth up becoz of them
learn to be more stronger and try to learn to be "cool + cruel"
cause im afraid…
afraid of hurt by someone. It’s pain..really pain…don’t feel want to
experience it again…

It’s quite a "dark" diary…
my mood is down..down..very down..
don’t feel want to maintain…

如果失去记忆能够带来新的开始,那我宁愿失去所有的记亿,重新开始…

Keep telling myself that,
BE HAPPY
@SMILE AND HAPPY ALWAYS@
hope it’s useful

This is just a personal diary,
just treat it as "normal"

Anyways, wish everyone has a nice day today^